Sea Song.

I was listening to this song while I wrote this.
Therefor I chose this title.




Is it crazy to want to help someone? To try and give it all just to make a difference for one person that seems helpless, alone and unaware of their potential?
Today has been far more back-stabbing than I would have expected. As if I hadn't gotten enough kicks in the ass for trying to put others first instead of me. But that's what I do. I never want to give up when I know I can make a difference for someone. I never want to give up whenever I see someone in need of help. There have been people that have done that for me years ago and without them I probably wouldn't be the person I am today. They saw I needed guidance at some point and they were there for me. Even though I pushed them away many times they kept coming back and tried not giving up on me. Because they saw what I was and what I was capable of. They knew there was more to me than what I showed.
We all lose our way at some point and sometimes we can't find it unless there is a close friend around or even your family.
I've appreciated that a lot and I only saw that after years and years when I noticed that there are so few people that want to do something for you without asking anything in return.
That's what I wanted to do. I wanted to make a difference for someone, I tried my best and while trying I got too attached. That was not supposed to happen, it was not planned.
And as usual, that someone turned their back at me. Walked away. One of the many that have done that. And I never learn. Never.


Call it pathetic, dumb, whatever you want. But that's just what I do.
Maybe the words are not the best choice but right now, I felt like sharing this. Maybe that person will read it, maybe .. I'll get a small pat and a "thank you for trying but I really didn't need it". Just maybe.
And maybe tomorrow will be different. Maybe I won't be disappointed anymore.
Maybe the sun will shine tomorrow and my friends will be around me.
Tomorrow I'll be home again.




Drive with me
Do the things you wont believe
Drive with me
Past the city and down to sea
Crushing Dreams
Leave me be, I cannot sleep
Drown with me
Past the city, down to sea
Rush of dream
Leave in peace, let me be
oh, it's the pain
It's ingrained in me
oh, soothe my pain
It's ingrained in me
Drive with me .

Tonight.

I have so many unfinished posts that I don't even know which to finish..


I've been thinking a lot lately about everything that has been happening and I'll go back to one of my favorite movies and quote " Happiness only real when shared".
I don't know what to believe in anymore, but I guess that's nothing new to the "agenda". I suppose we all have our moments of doubts and pointless thoughts. Tonight is one of those moments.